Philosophy of a Senseless Dreamer

Deviant Moon Tarot by Patrick Valenza

I've become numb to the representation of iterations that were once etched into my heart and soul. 

The words upon words have become meaningless because I worship myself 

and loathe everyone else.

Yet

I struggle with the thought that those words upon words still sting.

And the thought of you rebuking my being still burns me with insecurity.

I end your world with rejection 

because if forgiveness is love

then it is everything I am not.

No one is superior to anyone

it is an existential joke.

Some are cursed with arrogance and some are blessed with apathy.

Unfortunately

I am a dreamer.

I dream of peace and compromise

yet everyone is too busy sizing each other up

or trying to outdo one another.

That is why I'm deluded.

But if I'm deluded

so is everyone else!

Euphoria

Euphoria is...

Like a junkie to the drug
Like a thug to his gun
Like a cutter to the blade
Like the emptiness an anorexic craves
The condition turns into a disaster then we push to be free.

Like the beast in alcoholics
Like a power-hungry occultist
Like the mentality of a murderer
Like the demons the insane suffer
They pray for deliverance, some sacrifice their freedom just to lose themselves in the process.

Like a Christian to the Bible
Like a Muslim to the Koran
Like a Psychologist to the human mind

Or the doctor or nurse with the consuming desire to save a life.

Now they have no one
All they have is themselves and momentary peace.

And then there is misery...