Sugar Baby Blues

 

Art done by:

https://www.deviantart.com/misiasart     

    Abbey always had a thing for older men; not her, or any of her friends around her really understood where it came from. On several occasions, they would express concern, other times the friendships around her would just crumble. Her parents on the other hand, didn't seemed concerned, or even surprised. From an outsiders perspective, Abbey was the epitome of privilege--blonde hair, blue eyes, a cheerleader with an upper middle class family that had the means to help her pay for medical college. It made no sense that someone like her would attach herself to unstable father figures, but people often mistake beauty with goodness.

    When Abbey was 13, she fell in love with her art teacher, and continued to have an affair with him until she went off to high school. That same year, he went to prison for having sex with an 11 year old girl. Throughout high school, she juggled a relationship with both her high school boyfriend and his dad. They both got away with it, and the relationship with both of them ended when she graduated. Unfortunately, things got progressively worse during college. Her first semester there, she developed an obsession with a married teacher that resulted in her getting kicked out of school, and having to finish her courses online. When that didn't work out and she had to go to a different school, her parents refused to pay for it, so she developed unhealthy attachments to to sugar daddies that ultimately ended in heartbreak. The only person she ever opened up to was her best friend Kristy, who is currently consoling her confused, childhood best friend.

    "Abbey, honey, don't let that geriatric fuck boy get to you! We're in the prime of our lives, by the time we're 30, he'll be impotent."

    Abbey chuckles, wiping her tears with a damp Kleenex. "I just don't get it, he acted as if he really liked me. He told me he was only interested in dating me and being intimate with me, then when we go out dancing he blows me off for another woman! I mean seriously, what the fuck?!"

    "He's an emotionally stunted narcissist that treats women like props, that's it, it's not about you." Kristy was blunt in her analysis, which people either hated or admired, but Abbey appreciated her tough love.

    "Spoken like a true psychologist." Abbey gave a weak smile, she sniffles as she stares at her hands, playing with what is now an unusable wad of snot cotton.

    Kristy looks down in deep thought before sighing, "Abbey, I've known you my whole life and I love you very much, but this pattern..." Kristy pauses briefly to consider her next words carefully, "this pattern has remained consistent since we were kids and I'm really, really worried about you."

    They both remained silent for only a few seconds before Kristy continued, "At the Marsha Ross Institute, they're working on this experimental treatment plan. It's only been used on patience with amnesia associated with head trauma, but their has been a high success rate."

    Abbey rolls her eyes and chuckles, "uh Kristy, I don't have amnesia. Sharp memory? Spelling bee champ? I mean, HELLO!"

    Kristy didn't let her friends generic, cocky, cheerleader attitude distract her. "Maybe not, but I do think their could be something from your past that you may not be thinking about, and this may help you connect the dots."

    Abbey rolled her eyes, "for what purpose?'

    "Uh, so you can make healthier decisions for yourself and move on with you life? Duh!" Kristy replies with an edge to her tone, clearly irritated with her besties stubbornness.

    Abbey looks down at the Kleenex in her hands as she considers the idea, then throws it away in the small trashcan next to the couch. "OK, I'll do it."

                                                                                         ~

    A team of students, a doctor, and a professor surround Abbey in a sterile white room; Kristy stood next to her with a supportive hand in hers. The doctor spoke seriously and directly when regarding the treatment, "Abbey, this treatment will work much like a time machine. Your mind will take you back to a memory that you've forgotten, and probably for good reason. Do you understand that whatever you see, we are not responsible and the memory, as well as what you do with it, will be yours to carry?"

    Abbey felt a pang of fear and hesitation at the possibility of unresolved trauma, which she never bothered to consider. However, if that were the case, better to deal with it now than later. Still feeling uneasy at what she might discover, Abbey responds with a reluctant nod.

    "Are you sure? Once you go in and uncover these memories, theirs no going back."

    "Yes, I understand, I want to continue." Abbey replies with more confidence, but as more of an assurance to herself than the doctor.

    "OK, then lets begin."

                                                                                    ~

    Abbey was injected with a drug called Neocortoxine, a muscle relaxant that stimulated the part of the brain responsible for memory. Once the doctor placed a hat on Abbeys head--one that appeared  as if a robot gave birth to a pair of ominous tentacles, all of which were attached to what looked like a mini fridge with a couple of buttons and a light switch; immediately Abbey began to drift as neurostimulation allowed electrical impulses in the brain to uncover what was lost.

    Abbey stood in a poorly lit basement, surrounded by dusty boxes and cobwebs. She remembered this place from her early childhood, her parents had to downgrade after her baby brother was born. Luckily, they only stayed there for about 5 years; both her, and her parents absolutely hated the place. The basement was the worst of all--the musty air made Abbeys allergies twitch, causing her to choke. As she began to cough, two men descended the steps with a little girl traveling behind them. The little girl was Abbey when she was 6, one of the men was her dad, the other she didn't recognize. She was worried that they would see her, but as they approached the bottom of the steps, and all three of them walked past her without a second glance, and her coughing began to subside. She then realized that her experience there is merely palpable, not so concrete. She was--well, I suppose in a literal sense, a ghost within her own past acting as a spectator.

    Abbey walked around the corner to see her 6 year old self, sitting on an old couch next to the unknown man. He was older, old enough to be her grandfather; he had a tall, stocky form with a stern look about him, and a seemingly predatory gaze that never seemed to leave young Abbey. 

   Abbey watched the little version of herself look up to her dad as he gave her clear instructions, gesturing to a video camera. "Now, you're going to be a good girl and you're going to help daddy make a movie, OK? Then we'll go get ice cream!"

    Little Abbeys eyes sparkle innocently as she nodded emphatically, "But first," Abbeys dad stated as he held up a finger, pointed at the burly man on the couch. He leaned back, then unzipped his pants. "I need you to take care of my friend here--just like ice cream."

    Older Abbey gaped at the scene appalled and outraged; the violation of trust, the look of confusion and fear on young Abbeys face as the man roughly grabbed her by her hair, the secrets buried beneath an image of wealth of mediocrity...

    'How could I be so stupid!'

    Abbey jolted from her chemically induced hallucination, then began hyperventilating. Kristy runs over to her friend, taking the tentacle robot off her head. "Whats wrong honey? What did you see?"

    Abbeys sobs uncontrollably, "How could he do those things to me?!"

    "What do you mean? Who did what to you?" Kristy wiped the tears from Abbeys eyes.

    "My dad, he let men do horrible things to me when I was 6 and..." Abbeys bottom lip trembled, "fucking recorded it!"

    Kristy was afraid of this, hell, even the professionals in the room saw it coming; but Abbey needed to address the issues that were ruining her life. From this point on, Kristy could see that things were only going to get harder; not just for Abbey, but for the both of them. She knew that their was a possibility that this may even put a strain on their friendship, maybe even end it. She also knew that it was likely that Abbey may never come back from this, and inevitably blame her like she was currently blaming herself.

 

   As guilt began to rise up in Kristy's throat, she choked out a small sob lamenting the suggestion she had made, then lovingly embraces her. "Shhh, I'm here bestie, I'll be here every step of the way. You're not alone..."